REAL BUMPERSTICKERS!
No kidding!
(these are all intended as humourous material)
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Support Cannibalism-EAT ME!
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God is my copilot, but the Devil is my bombardier.
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I don't have a license to kill. I have a learner's
permit.
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I wasn't born a bitch. Men like you made me this
way.
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Keep honking while I reload.
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Taxation WITH representation isn't so hot, either!
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Who were the beta testers for Preparations A
through G?
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Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change.
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5 days a week my body is a temple. The other
two, it's an
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amusement park.
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EARTH FIRST! We'll strip-mine the other
planets later.
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Your child may be an honor student but you're
still an idiot.
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If you drink, don't park. Accidents cause people.
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If you can read this, I can hit my brakes and
sue you.
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Save the whales! Trade them for valuable prizes.
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Whitewater is over when the First Lady sings.
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Jack Kevorkian for White House physician.
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Just say no! To sex with pro-lifers.
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My wife keeps complaining I never listen to her.
. .or something like that.
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Sure you can trust the government! Just ask an
Indian!
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Alcohol and calculus don't mix. Never drink and
derive.
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If we are what we eat; I'm cheap, fast, and easy.
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Stop repeat offenders. Don't re-elect them!
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Some people are only alive because it is
illegal to shoot them.
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A bartender is just a pharmacist with a
limited inventory.
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I used to have a handle on life, but it
broke.
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Don't take life too seriously, you won't get
out alive.
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WANTED: Meaningful overnight relationship.
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You're just jealous because the voices only talk
to me.
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BEER: It's not just for breakfast anymore.
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I got a gun for my wife....Best trade I
ever made.
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So you're a feminist...Isn't that cute.
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Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
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I need someone really bad...Are you really bad?
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Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.
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I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.
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All men are idiots....I married their king.
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The more you complain, the longer God makes
you live.
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IRS: We've got what it takes to take
what you've got.
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Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness
pays off now.
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Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle
drugs.
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Out of my mind...Back in five minutes.
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Keep honking...I'm reloading.
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Prevent inbreeding...Ban country music.
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As long as their are tests, there will be prayer
in public schools.
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WARNING: The driver only carries
$20.00 in Ammunition.
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I want to die peacefully in my sleep like
my grandfather...Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
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Montana: At least the cows are sane.
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God must love stupid people...He made SO many
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I said "no" to drugs, but they didn't listen.
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Your kid may be an honor student, but YOU'RE
still an idiot.
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When you do a good deed, get a receipt, in case
heaven is like the IRS
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Smile, it's the second best thing you can
do with your lips.
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I took an IQ test and the results were
negative.
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Where there's a will...I want to be on
it.
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It's lonely at the top, but you eat better.
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WARNING: Dates on the calendar are
closer than they appear.
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Give me ambiguity or give me something
else.
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Don't drink and drive...You might hit a
bump and spill your drink.
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ELVIS IS DEAD...And I don't feel so good myself.
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We are born naked, wet, and hungry...Then
things get worse.
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Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at
math.
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Friends help you move. Real friends
help you move bodies.
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Consciousness: That annoying time between
naps.
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I like you, but I wouldn't want to see
you working on subatomic particles.
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3 kinds of people, Those who count, and
those who can't.
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Ever stop to think, and forget to start
again?
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Always remember you're unique...Just like
everyone else.
One star shines a bright light....and several
make a mighty galaxy!